INTERNET HUMOR PAGES

A woman goes to a plastic surgeon to get some work done. She says to the surgeon, "What can you do for me?"

The surgeon says, "Well, you have bags under your eyes, I can fix those, and you have crow's feet by your eyes. I can tighten the skin up."

The woman asks for a price, and the surgeon gives her one. She says she can afford more than that, what else can he do?

"Well," says the surgeon, "your forehead is a little wrinkley, I can pull that tight. Also, your jowls droop down. I can fix that, also."

Again, the woman asks for a price, and says that she can afford more than the surgeon says, and asks what else he can do.

The surgeon says, "Well, for $1200, I can give you the full treatment, from the neck up. You have a double chin, and I can fix that for you. Also, your neck and throat are a little baggy. I can pull all that tight for you. And, as an extra, I will put a small screw in the back of your neck, under your hair. When you start to get more wrinkles, you can come in, and I will tighten the screw a bit, and tighten your skin right up."

The woman agrees, and has the work done. She looks beautiful. 8 months later, the woman calls the surgeon on the phone.

"Doctor! I have a problem! I have these hugh bags under my eyes! I have never had bags like this before! I need to come in and have you fix this!"

The surgeon says to her, "Lady, those aren't bags, those are your tits. And, if you don't stop turning that screw, you're gonna have a goatee."

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