Kitchen Essentials: The Blonde's Guide to Stocking a Kitchen

HAIR DRYER: For thawing frozen foods. Also handy for clearing crumbs from the counter.

CONCEALER: For hiding meatloaf blemishes and other cooking imperfections.

SELF-TANNING LOTION: For browning food.

CURLING IRON: For making rotini and other neat pasta shapes.

DISHWASHER: His name is Hans!

DOG: For cleaning the kitchen floor.

SUNLAMP: For creme brulee.

MAGIC 8-BALL: For choosing the right wine.

FIRE EXTINGUISHER: In case your roast is a little overcooked. Also useful to make a tasty dessert topping. Fill extinguisher with whipped cream, aim hose at your favorite dessert, spray and enjoy!

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