INTERNET HUMOR PAGES

A retired sailor purchased a computer and began to learn all about computing. Being a sailor, he was used to addressing his ships as "She" or "Her". But was unsure what was proper for computers.

To solve his dilemma, he found two groups of computer experts: one group was male, and the other group was female.

The group of women reported that computers should be referred to as "HE" because:
01. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
02. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
03. They are supposed to help you solve problems but half the time they are the problem.
04. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a newer and better model.
05. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.
06. They get hot when you turn them on, and that's the only time you have their attention.
07. They're typically obsolete within five years and need to be traded in for a new model. Some users, however, feel they've already invested so much in the stupid machine that they're compelled to remain with an underpowered system.
08. They'll usually do what you ask them to do, but they won't do more than they have to and they won't think of it on their own.
09. They periodically cut you off right when you think you've established a network connection.
10. They're heavily dependant on external tools and equipment.

The group of men reported that computers should be referred to as "SHE" because:
01. No one but the creator understands their logic.
02. The native language they use to talk to other computers is incomprehensible to anyone else.
03. The message "Bad command or file name" is about as informative as, "If you don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you."
04. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for later retrieval.
05. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

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