INTERNET HUMOR PAGES

Before and After you get Married:

 before marriage  after marriage
 you take my breath away  I feel like I'm suffocating
 twice a night  twice a month
 she says she loves the way I take control of a situation  she calls me a controlling, manipulative, egomaniac
 Lucy and Ricky  Fred and Ethel
 Saturday night fever  Monday night football
 he makes me feel like a million dollars  if I had a dime for every stupid thing he's done
 don't stop  don't start
 the sound of music  the sound of silence
 is that all you are having?  maybe you should just have a salad, honey
 wheel of fortune  jeopardy
 its like I'm living a dream  its like he lives in a dorm
 $60/doz.roses  $1.50/stem rose
 turbo charged  jump start
 we agree on everything  doesn't she have a mind of her own?
 Victoria's Secret  Fruit of the Loom
 charming and noble  Chernobyl
 feathers and handcuffs  ball and chain
 idol  idle
 I love a woman with curves  I never said you were fat
 he's completely lost without me  why won't he ever ask for directions?
 time stood still  this relationship is going nowhere
 croissant and cappuccino  toast and instant
 blind  nearsighted
 you look so seductive in black  your clothes are so depressing
 oysters  fishsticks
 I can hardly believe we found each other  I can't believe I ended up with someone like you
 passion  ration

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