INTERNET HUMOR PAGES

Driver Identification

How to identify where a driver is from:

New York: One hand on the wheel, one hand on the horn.

Chicago: One hand on wheel, one finger out window.

Boston: One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on accelerator.

California: One hand on wheel, one hand cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator.

Los Angeles: One hand on wheel, one hand cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator with gun in lap.

Ohio: Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror, but driving in California.

Montana: Both feet holding the brake while their buddy takes a leak.

Italy: Both hands in air, gesturing, both feet on accelerator, head turned to talk to someone in back seat.

Seattle: One hand on latte, one knee on wheel, one hand cradling cell phone, foot on brake, mind on game.

Texas city Male: One hand on wheel, one hand on hunting rifle, alternating between both feet being on the accelerator and both on the brake, throwing a McDonald's bag out the window.

OR

Texas country male: One hand on wheel, one hand hanging out the window, keeping speed steadily at 70mph, driving down the center of the road unless coming around a blind curve, in which case they are on the left side of the road.

Texas female: One hand constantly refocusing the rearview mirror to show different angles of the BIG hair, one hand going between mousse, brush, and rattail to keep the helmet hair going, both feet on the accelerator, poodle steering the car, chrome .38 revolver with mother of pearl inlaid handle in the glove compartment.

Colorado: Both hands on steering wheel in a relaxed posture, eyes constantly checking the rearview mirror to watch for visible emissions from their own or another's car.

West Virginia male: Four wheel drive pickup truck, shotgun mounted in rear window, beer cans on floor, squirrel tails attached to antenna.

Las Vegas: Junked, driven by someone who previously had a nice car and who is now wearing a barrel.

Florida: Two hands gripping wheel, blue hair barely visible above window level, driving 35 on the interstate in the left lane with the left blinker on.

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