INTERNET HUMOR PAGES

Women's Snappy Comebacks To Pickup Lines

 Haven't we met before?  Yes, I'm the receptionist at the V.D. Clinic.
 Haven't I seen you someplace before?  Yeah, that's why I don't go there any more.
 Is this seat empty?  Yes, And mine will be too if you sit down.
 So, wanna go back to my place?  Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock.
 Your place or mine?  Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.
 I'd really like to get into your pants.  No thanks. There's already one asshole in there.
 I'd like to call you. What's your number?  It's in the phone book.
 But I don't know your name.  That's in the phone book too.
 So what do you do for a living?  I'm a female impersonator.
 What sign were you born under?  No Parking.
 Hey, baby, what's your sign?  Do Not Enter!
 How do you like your eggs in the morning?  Unfertilized!
 Hey' come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason.  Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!
 I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy.  You mean you've got both a donkey and a Great Dane?
 I know how to please a woman.  Then please leave me alone.
 I want to give myself to you.  Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.
 I can tell that you want me.  Ohhhhh. You're so right. I want you - dead.
 If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.  Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
 Hey cutie, how 'bout you and me hitting the hot spots?  Sorry, I don't date outside my species.
 May I see you pretty soon?  Why? Don't you think I'm pretty now?
 Your body is like a temple.  Sorry, there are no services today.
 I'd go through anything for you.  Good! Let's start with your bank account.
 I would go to the end of the world for you.  Yes, but would you stay there?
 Where have you been all my life? (from an older man)  For the first half of it, I probably wasn't born yet.

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