Let us not forget the life-extension researcher, who, while pursuing the remarkable immune systems of sharks, also found that dolphins fed exclusively on seabird meat had apparently infinite natural life spans, barring accident or other misfortune. But misfortune is exactly what befell the research one day: In taking a load of seagull carcasses out to the dolphin tank one day, he found a lion blocking his path, evidently escaped from another part of the zoo where the research was being conducted.

He reached for a tranquilized dart gun, immobilized the beast, and was about to step over the dazed creature, gull meat in hand when federal agents emerged from concealment to arrest him for transporting gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.

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